Chapter 20 My Deskmate Who Was Burned to Death by My Own Hands
The footprints were very delicate, clearly a woman's. The master squatted down and looked closely at the black lines, which were actually moving.
"It's trapped."
The master took out a black bag, the same as a flour bag, black in color, maybe he dyed it himself. When the master took it out, I saw that my hands were stained black. The master covered them, then closed the bag and tied it up.
"Pick it up, pack up the white ash, black thread and everything else, and throw them outside the gate. I'm going back."
We stared blankly at the master as he left. The black bag was bulging, as if it contained something alive, but we didn't see it, obviously we didn't see it. My father was stunned.
Bai Jie held my hand tightly and didn't move.
Let’s go back to the room, said my father.
"Send her back."
I know what my father meant, that no matter how late it is, he must send Bai Jie back.
"Uncle, I'm scared."
Bai Jie didn't want to leave, and my father glared at me.
"It's okay, I'll take you back."
When I was sending Bai Jie off, we were two people anyway, but when I came back, I got scared. As I started running, I heard someone chasing me, also running. I suddenly stopped, and the footsteps disappeared. I thought, Master's trick might not work, this is going to cause big trouble.
I ran wildly again and rushed into the yard. My father was standing in the yard.
"Why are you running?"
"Don't mention it. Master's trick might not have worked. Someone is chasing me, and I can't see them."
"You're just worried about it. You'll be fine after a good night's sleep."
My father didn't believe it.
At work, Bai Jie's eyes were red, obviously she didn't sleep well.
As soon as we entered the refining room, the master came. He looked at me without saying anything and asked me to come out.
"I drank too much yesterday and cut a hole in the bag."
I closed my eyes and understood. What that meant was that the thing in the bag ran away?
"What the hell is that?"
"How should I put it? What people often call ghosts are actually a kind of guardian spirit, the spirit of the soul."
"What if he runs away?"
"It'll take a bit of effort to catch her again. That's not a problem. I'm just telling you, don't be afraid. She's just following you now and can't do anything. But I'm also confused. How could she follow you? What's wrong with you?"
I was thinking about it, and suddenly I remembered that before this incident happened, when I was transporting a corpse, it was a woman who was about the same age as me. When I saw her suddenly, I was shocked. She looked a bit like my classmate, but after putting on makeup, it was not so easy to recognize her. At that time, I just thought she looked a bit similar.
I told this and the master looked at me.
"Come to the Dalai Restaurant after get off work. I'll wait for you."
The master is gone, and I noticed that he has been acting a little strange lately.
Yi He has always been angry because his master didn't recognize him as his apprentice and just took him under his wing. This is something I don't understand.
I asked the master, and he almost kicked me, so I didn't dare to ask again. Yihe asked me to ask, but I didn't dare to ask. Yihe didn't dare to ask the master either. I heard that Yihe was slapped twice by the master just because he asked about this. I don't believe it, it's all nonsense. The master is a well-educated person and will not slap anyone easily. He will only do this to his apprentice. He believes that his apprentice is his son.
After work, Bai Jie and I went to the Dali Restaurant. In those days, the Dali Restaurant was like a five-star hotel; sitting there signified style, wealth, status, and position.
I held Bai Jie's hand. She hesitated for a long time about the watch given by the master, but finally put it on.
When we went in, the master was already there. After we sat down, the master started ordering dishes without asking Bai Jie or me. He didn't ask me because I was the apprentice and had to listen to the master. Logically speaking, Bai Jie was my apprentice, and my master was her master's grandfather. Needless to say, in this era, the master was older than the father.
The chef ordered six dishes. Bai Jie looked at me and I knew that this meal would cost ten yuan and the chef had money.
We drank some wine, and Bai Jie drank some too.
"When you have time, go check on your classmate and see if she's still alive."
I was really scared when the master suddenly mentioned this. I don’t want this to happen.
"I'll be there right away. It's on the third floor at the back."
This classmate of mine was originally a big landlord or a capitalist. Among all our classmates, she lived in an apartment building and was the most beautifully dressed. She had a pair of leather shoes that were always very shiny. At that time, few teachers in our school wore leather shoes. Even if there were any, they were not made of leather, but of leather. Their shoes were pure leather and so shiny that they could reflect light on people.
I went downstairs and walked to the back. The building was four stories high, and her house was at the back. I had been to her house four times, and I was the only classmate who had been there.
At that time, she was very kind to me. There were three sons in my family. Although my father was educated, he earned very little, so we were as poor as a ghost. But she was always kind to me. She brought me food and sometimes even brought me her brother's clothes. Anyway, she was always kind to me.
I walked up the building again, and it was already dilapidated. I walked up the dark stairs. Her house was on the third floor. Both houses on this floor were hers.
I knocked on the door for a long time, and then an old man came out. I recognized him. It was Hao Fei's father.
"I'm Hao Fei's classmate, Ke Zuo."
Obviously, the old man no longer remembers me. His reaction is very slow, unlike when I met him. At that time, he was a handsome man, but now he has become like this. I think it’s a bit strange.
"You are the little boy who came to our house when he was little, right?"
I nodded, he actually remembered.
"Come in!"
The house was clearly in decline. I sat down on the same old sofa, a bit sagging. Who could afford a sofa back then? A single armchair was a big deal.
The old man went into a room, which belonged to Hao Fei. She let him in. After a while, the old man came out with a diary.
"This is for you."
I was very surprised.
"Hao Fei died. Before she died, she told me to give this to you. She said you would definitely come."
I stood there in a daze. What did this mean? The old man didn't want to keep me, saying he was tired and wanted to sleep.
I took out the diary, thought for a long time, and put it in the pocket of my cup. I couldn't let Bai Jie see it. Although there was nothing between Hao Fei and me, women are narrow-minded.
I went back, sat down, looked at the master and said.
"Someone is dead. I'm sure the one who was burned was Hao Fei."
After I finished speaking, I felt like crying. Why? Why did it have to be Hao Fei? She died so young. How did she die? I don't know. I don't know.
I feel a little confused.
"It is, it is."
The master didn't say anything else, Bai Jie asked.
"What should we do then?"
"Let me think about this."
That day, my master went home, and Bai Jie and I went to her house and talked about the marriage. Her family agreed.
I went home, went into my room and closed the door.
I opened the diary and saw a photo on it, in black and white. In that era, no one could afford to take photos, and she was so old. She smiled at me innocently, still so sunny. She liked to smile, especially to me. We held hands, and I pulled her to run. She always waited for me outside the school after school, and then we went to a place far away from the school, where there was grass. She let me pull her to run, and sometimes let me carry her on my back to run. She said I ran like the wind, and in the end, I really ran like the wind. In the school race, I really ran like the wind, and no one could catch up with me.
I burst into tears. After graduating from elementary school, she transferred away, saying she was going to a better school. We never met again. From that day on, I no longer ran like the wind. Hao Fei took away my speed.
I felt lonely during those years.
The diary records the days we were together. In almost every entry, she described me as a man like the wind. Man? She actually used the word man to describe me, saying that sooner or later I would be able to take her to the sky. She firmly believed it.
I couldn't bear to watch any further. I really regretted it. It was her who was burned that day. When I hugged her, my heart ached. I was in a bad mood that day and I didn't realize it would be her. I covered my face and cried.
The next day, I went to the grassland. The land there had been plowed and it was in a mess. The wild flowers and green grass would no longer grow. I shook my head and left. This was where Hao Fei and I spent the most time together. It was full of happy times. We always lay on the grass, she resting her head on me, looking at the sky. The clouds in the sky were always changing, and she could tell at any time whether it was an eagle, a bird, or a snake. Only after she pointed it out could I see it. It was at that time that I fell in love with the clouds in the sky, the clouds rolling and unrolling .
I went to the crematorium. The master was sitting outside and Yi He was busy inside. It seemed that not many people were being cremated today.
"Master, let her go."
The master stood there in a daze for a long time before speaking.
"She loves you, and has always loved you. It has never changed. Only unchanging love can have footsteps following you. She won't hurt you, but she will follow you, always, maybe for the rest of your life. However, she will hurt Bai Jie."
I lit a cigarette for the master and squatted aside.
"What will happen to her if I do?"
"Spiritual energy, indeed, is very spiritual. Most people wouldn't be able to do this. If I put her in a black bag, then put it in a jar, seal it, and bury it underground, it would remain there for thousands and thousands of years, without reincarnation or rebirth. That's it."
"No, it's too dark. She's afraid of the dark."
The master looked at me and said nothing. At this moment, I didn’t know what to do.
"If you don't do this, Bai Jie will be possessed and lose her true nature. Then she will no longer be Bai Jie. It's like when a person's temperament changes drastically, a person suddenly becomes a different person. That's because they've been possessed by a spirit. The spirit is taking over, that's it."
"What will happen then?"
"Bai Jie is no longer Bai Jie, it's just Bai Jie's body. She is Hao Fei. This is unfair."
The master stood up and went in. I sat on the chair, smoking, and started crying loudly. I was used to this kind of crying. At first, I couldn't stand it, but now sometimes, it's like I can't hear it.
I smoked a few cigarettes and left, not knowing how to make this decision.
I don’t know if the master has any other ideas, but I think maybe he does.
I went downstairs to Hao Fei's house again. I wanted to know more, but I felt it was unnecessary. It would be unfair with Bai Jie around.
I drank too much that day, and my father carried me home. He took care of me all night.
When I woke up in the morning, today was Labor Day. People had joy on their faces and there were people working and cleaning up everywhere on the streets.
When I entered the office, Bai Jie looked unhappy.
"You didn't sleep well?"
"No, Master, I had a dream. One night, there was a girl who kept pestering me. She followed me and cried non-stop. I asked her why she was crying, but she didn't say anything."
I'm sweating.
"fine."
Bai Jie glanced at the skull hanging by the window and felt unhappy.
There were only three deaths today.
"All three open."
I wanted to finish the work early and later. After the stove was lit, the manager came in, looked at me and said.
"come out."
I went out and saw that the manager was not happy.
"What's up?"
"You're running three furnaces, it's a waste."
"I want to open four. If you are the one introducing me, I won't mind the trouble. But I will have to burn you in the fourth furnace."
The director's face turned green.
"Ke Zuo, don't think I'm afraid of your master. I'm afraid of you too."
The director was so angry that he walked away with his hands behind his back.
I went in, carried the bodies, and put them in one by one.
Bai Jie stood aside and watched with the skewer in her hand. I lit another cigarette. I couldn't control myself during this period and smoked a little too much.
That day, after get off work, I went to look for the master, but couldn't find him. The master was not at home. When I got home, my eldest and second brothers were there.
"It's the holiday, let's have a meal together, call Bai Jie over."
The eldest brother said.
"Never mind, she's tired."
The eldest brother looked at me and said.
"Since we want to become a family, we can't stop you. Let's see what this person is like."
"She lives with me, not with you. What's the point? Besides, she was burned to death. She smells like a dead person, and you don't like it."
My words made my father unhappy.
"That's your eldest brother. When I die, the eldest brother will be the father."
"Sorry, not in the mood."
I opened the door to go out, but my second sister-in-law stopped me.
"Xiao Zuo, it's a big holiday, don't."
I went back to my room and locked Hao Fei's diary in that small box.
